Welcome to ENYCEEEE

Welcome to Enycee. Who listens to car alarms these days anyways? Well this is my first rude awakening to the wonders of NYC. In Buffalo I would leave the doors to the house unlocked since it was too inconvenient for me to get my keys and open the door whenever I want to go in. There was never an after thought since Amherst is the safest city in the United States. Once when I came home and the doors were locked I panicked and thought the burglars broke in, and locked us out.

So anyways, apparently after the neighbors saw my car window missing they decided to lay down some golden advice they should have told me days ago.

1) Never park your car in the same spot for more than a few days, always move it around so “prowlers” yes, prowlers, will know the car isn’t “abandoned” and it doesn’t invite them to smash a window and steal your stuff.

2) Sometimes the thieves are very courteous and will jimmy the lock open on older vehicles so they do not do any damage, or just break the small window in the backdoors. Since my car is not old (2003) and it’s not a four door vehicle (it’s a 2 door hatchback) with only 1 big window, this courtesy was not extended to me

3) Never leave change lying out in your coin holder. Teen Hooligans (neighbor’s definition) will break into your car to steal the change.

4) Do not leave any cigarette lighter adapters or splitters in the open. This makes the Teen Hooligans think that there is something attached on the other end, like a GPS or an iPOD and will break into your car only to discover there is nothing attached at all and they just busted your windows for nothing.

5) Tint your windows so Teen Hooligans cannot look into your car and see what’s available.

6) Use the CLUB or other anti-theft device as a discouragement. Although they fail to realize that that serves no function to me, because they can steal everything in the car since no one wants to actually steal my crummy car itself.

7) Park in your driveway in the backyard instead of in the street. (Darn you minivan for blocking me out of the driveway)

8) The neighbor in the 3rd house on the street is the one that probably stole your GPS, so go get him, and make sure to get my coins they stole back also. He might have a gun so be careful.

FML.